I have discovered more recently that I am a 'yes' person. I am the person who raises a hand to every opportunity or offers help at first chance. Maybe you can relate? Maybe you too have this sub-conscience desire to prove yourself. It feels good to feel needed. I think we all have that desire somewhere deep inside.
As I was at lunch last week, a wise friend and coworker spoke into this pattern of saying 'yes'. She reminded me how easily someone who values responsibility, when saying 'yes' to everything, also desires to do all things to perfection. Because when you value responsibility, just okay is not enough. Just okay is actually quite devastating. And that's where things have gotten messy lately in my heart.
I've struggled to come to the conclusion that if we continue to say 'yes' to every opportunity we're presented, will we ever be able to give our best to every opportunity?
No matter how great and exciting the opportunity, if our plates are already filled to capacity, can you give it the time and effort it deserves?
For myself, I come up short. When I have a plate spinning on each finger, one is bound to get dropped (and has been dropped). As hard as it seems to admit to my 24 year old self, I have limitations. And recently, I've been learning how to define those limits. And more often than not, finding those limits draw upon our families values.
I'm saying 'no' to saying 'yes' because I desire to put my work away in the evenings and spend intentional time with my husband. I desire to make a home cooked meal and truly soak in the process of chopping, stirring, mixing, and baking. I want to sit down at the table with my husband at the end of a busy day, and I want my focus to be on him and the happenings of his day and celebrating what God has done in and through that day.
I don't want to take my 'yes' home with me day after day after day.
I'm saying 'no' to saying 'yes' because I can do a few things well, but I can't do everything well.
So I will choose. I will choose to say 'yes' to the opportunities that fit within the values of our family. Somedays that will mean laying aside my human desire to be needed or recognized. Somedays it will bring disappointment both to myself and others. But ultimately saying 'no' to saying 'yes' frees me to experience this life I've been given. It may not appear in outward successes, but I know with certainty it will be reflected in what matters most to myself; my walk with the Lord, my marriage, my relationships with family and friends, and my ministry.
So really, I'm just learning how to say 'no' to saying 'yes'. Learning how to discern the opportunities God has laid before me.
I'D LOVE TO HEAR YOUR THOUGHTS?
Are you a 'yes' person too? How have you discerned through the waters of saying 'no'?